[00:00] Valerie Beck: Rise, Renew, Reconnect. Welcome to from the Ashes, a podcast where every story ignites hope and healing.
[00:21] Valerie Beck: All right, everyone. Welcome back to from the Ashes. I'm your host, Valerie Hwang Baek, and today I have my friend and my personal trainer with me, Be more or Benjamin. So Benjamin is based in Long Beach, California.
[00:35] He's a personal development guide, a meditation practitioner, and personal trainer. He just walked me through a really cool breathing exercise, brings a lot to the table, and has been just really great in helping me push my edge.
[00:49] So I'm really happy to have him on the show. Welcome, Benjamin.
[00:53] BMOOR: Hey, what's up, Valerie? Thank you for having me on your show. What's up, everybody? Tuning in and listening for. Appreciate you guys tapping in. Really honored and happy to be here.
[01:03] Valerie Beck: Yeah. So we're going to dig into your story today.
[01:07] I met Benjamin at a local wellness center called Human Aon. Shout out to Human Aon.
[01:14] And really connected. And just I really appreciate your personal philosophy on development, and you've alluded to your story before. So we're going to dig a little bit into that and how you got here today, especially as a personal development guide, because I know that you've been through some personal transformations that have really guided your philosophy.
[01:34] So I actually, usually when I start off with these episodes, I ask people to share their from the Ashes story. But since I already know that you have one, I want to get a little bit more specific.
[01:46] BMOOR: Oh, wow.
[01:47] Valerie Beck: So there's something that is called a Harajuku moment. And I actually learned this from the Tim Ferriss podcast or his blog. And he describes this Harajuku moment as. As a time in your life where there was.
[02:01] It was a turning point. And up until that point, you were living a certain way with certain beliefs. And then in that moment, it was like a point of no return where there was a mental switch.
[02:13] And from there, then everything changes. Right. And it has to do with, like, a series of choices you make after that, but it's like a fundamental. Like, something happens within you that sets off your transformational journey.
[02:27] So my question is, did you have a harajuku moment?
[02:31] And if so, please share that with us. To begin.
[02:34] BMOOR: Oh, whoa. That's a. That's a loaded, intense, powerful question. And I just want to make sure I'm saying it right. Harajuku.
[02:44] Valerie Beck: Harajuku. So actually, harajuku refers to the neighborhood in Japan and has nothing to do with the term Harajuku. So it's H A R A J U K U Harajuku.
[02:57] BMOOR: Yeah.
[02:58] Valerie Beck: I really don't know why it's called that.
[03:01] BMOOR: It's a great name, very powerful context pretext.
[03:06] So I guess like you said, right, there's a series of events that leads up to that powerful Harajuku moment.
[03:17] And so for me, just to give a little bit of context, I had suffered from alcoholism and drug abuse for a good 10 years. It getting really, really bad the last four years that I was in it.
[03:32] And so with all that journey that I know you can kind of imagine, my Harajuku moment was I had ended up moving back in with my mom.
[03:43] I didn't need to like financially but spiritually and mentally and energetically I needed to. And my relationship with my mom is a whole nother story and itself that I'm sure we'll touch upon.
[03:55] But one night I had moved, I was back, I was back in my mom's house, I was in my room and it was like 4 in the morning. I was coming home from a bender that was like my everyday every night at that point.
[04:07] And I remembered I knew I wanted to be again. Well, not again. But for those who don't know, I'm from Connecticut. So I moved to California six years ago and my Harajuku moment is what helped me get to California actually, which was the night in the room at 4am on a bender or coming down from a bender.
[04:27] And I was like, wow, how am I going to get to California?
[04:30] It's going to have to be through rehab.
[04:34] And that out of all the times that I had tried to get sober like that was it the fact that I was finally looking at rehabs have gotten that bad.
[04:43] And I was like, wow. So I remember I'm scoring through rehabs on my phone in California, like which one am I going to go to? You know, how am I going to make this happen?
[04:51] And so that was November 5th of 2018, almost a six year anniversary coming up this week actually.
[05:00] And so once, once I did that, the next morning I woke up and I just felt this just calling inside of me like hey, like this is it, you either go to rehab, you stay here and you die.
[05:16] But for me I've always had this like I've had this understanding of my power for a very long time. So I was like, you know what, let me just try to do this month of November, sober, no alcohol.
[05:28] Because when I drank that's when I would do get into the hard drugs and all the other stuff. So I was like Let me just. No alcohol. And I ended up going the whole November by myself of no alcohol.
[05:39] And it was really hard. And after that month, I was like, okay, I'm never going to have another sip of alcohol, because if I do, then I know myself. I have a very intense and addict.
[05:49] I can't have an addictive personality.
[05:52] So I didn't. I never touched alcohol ever again since that night, November 5th. And so that was my big harajuku moment. Was looking at rehabs in my room back in my mom's house.
[06:04] Valerie Beck: All right, there we go.
[06:06] BMOOR: Yeah, we're starting off with a bang.
[06:09] Valerie Beck: Yeah.
[06:10] I mean, it takes a lot, right, to really. To. To look at yourself really honestly, especially when it's like we. A lot of times we. We don't want to. That's the scary part.
[06:21] BMOOR: Right.
[06:21] Valerie Beck: I want to ask too, like, can you describe who you were before that?
[06:26] BMOOR: Before that?
[06:28] Valerie Beck: Before your harajuku moment? Yeah. Like, what was your life like and all of that.
[06:32] BMOOR: I was somebody that was very angry. I was very sad, I was very depressed. I suffered from a lot of anxiety.
[06:40] And all of that stemmed from a lot of hardships in my life that started very young. I know we all face trials and tribulations, and I say some of us face a little bit more.
[06:51] More intense ones. And all of our trials and tribulations are valid no matter what shape or size they are.
[07:00] I, from my journey, just went through a lot, like, a lot, a lot of trials and tribulations. Young.
[07:06] Should I get into them? Like, should I speak on them right now?
[07:09] Valerie Beck: You can. You can say as much, as little as you would.
[07:12] BMOOR: Okay. Yeah. So at the age of five to, like, seven, I had experienced sexual abuse.
[07:19] And then through high school, with that being said, I just didn't. Wasn't really in tune with my sexuality. Or maybe I had, like, what the people call, like, leaky sexual energy.
[07:31] And then I started drinking at 15, started smoking weed around the same time. 15, 16.
[07:37] And then I lost my father to cancer at 17 years old.
[07:43] My relationship with my mom, like I spoke. Spoke. Spoke about before, was very volatile and very. I had an. I still have an estranged relationship with my mom.
[07:51] And so with all these factors, I just. I just suffered. I was just. I was suffering. I wasn't a good person.
[07:58] Once I was living the lifestyle that encompassed the drugs and the alcohol, I was getting a lot of fights. I was getting arrested every other month.
[08:07] My relationship with women wasn't healthy, stemming from, you know, I would say relationship with my mom. The sexual abuse that I had counted. I was very oversexual.
[08:16] And it just, it just felt like it just kept, it just kept avalanching and it was just always a snowball effect. I would always ask the question, what worst could happen?
[08:29] What now? And every time I asked that, right around the corner, the next worst thing would happen.
[08:34] And all of these things stemmed around my, my mind. Everything in this world starts with our thoughts, starts with our subconscious mind. And so I had all these limiting beliefs.
[08:47] I had all these programs from the world, plus people around me that had really taken over me, had really taken over my, my pureness, my purity. And then, so after that Hota juku moment, I got sober.
[09:03] It took a lot of rewiring in my subconscious mind. And I'm still, you know, every day is still the process. Yeah, but it gets easier, or I don't want to say easier, it gets more apparent and profound once you really start doing the work.
[09:21] In the beginning, getting through the tough, thick layers, and then once you get through that, it becomes a little bit more sustainable for you. And then once you see the work working, it's like you just got to, you just, you got to do the work and you almost want to do the work because you just start getting more levels of self awareness.
[09:40] And people always ask me like, hey, like, what's the best part of what you got going on right now? Like the business, you know, the lifestyle, yada, yada, yada. And I'm like, you don't even get it.
[09:50] It's the self awareness.
[09:52] It's the self awareness is the best part. So it's been a lot of work. So to answer your question, who I was before Audi Jugwomen, I was not, I wasn't, I would say I wasn't a good person because I wasn't contributing anything of value to society or to anybody.
[10:09] It was, it was a lot of destruction.
[10:11] Valerie Beck: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, thank you for sharing that and for the really profound answer. There's actually a lot that I would, I want to dig into with that because I think that this, this, this notion that the work doesn't get easier, but it does get more, you get, the more drawn to it.
[10:29] It's something that I, I feel like every day.
[10:32] And, and the self awareness as key also like really resonates with what I do as well. Because I don't think that life necessarily gets easier.
[10:47] BMOOR: No.
[10:48] Valerie Beck: You know, even when we do have self awareness. But there's something about, there's something so precious about it that like, I would not trade it for anything right yeah. So my next question for you is around then, after your Harajuku moment, because we know that transformation happens kind of in cycles and there's ups and downs.
[11:10] Right. And it doesn't stop.
[11:11] BMOOR: Right.
[11:12] Valerie Beck: As long as you're committed to the path, like you just continue to grow.
[11:16] What are some of the, what, what is the transformation that transpired and what, what did you notice changing within yourself?
[11:25] BMOOR: Okay, great. Another great question.
[11:28] The transformation that, man, I'm living right now and at a certain level it's like I don't have words for it, but to come up with the words for it for our audience and for us.
[11:42] Oh, beautiful.
[11:45] You know what? From the ashes, you know, it's like the Phoenix, Phoenix rising. I had to be burnt down. You know how like you put iron in a fire to make it as strong as possible and weld it.
[11:57] That's the transformation that I went through. I had to be put through the fire.
[12:01] And so two things that I want to touch on was, is the inspiration for that transformation, which would be everybody or a lot of people have heard of David Goggins.
[12:14] So I had heard his story before he blew up about seven, eight years ago. And the one thing that always stuck out to me about what he would preach is, you have to stop feeling sorry for yourself.
[12:29] He says, we all have this big bag of **** that we're trying to like carry on our back and it's just weighing us down and it's heavy and it smells and it's like, wait a minute, why do I want to keep carrying this thing?
[12:39] Like, who wants to carry on a big bag of ****? And so just that message kept hitting me. And one day I was like, I was like, you know what, I don't need to carry this anymore.
[12:48] I'm going to throw it over there and not be weighed down by all these self limiting beliefs, all the depression, all the anxiety, all the negative thoughts. And so what the transformation looked like was the number one catalyst for my transformation, which I think is like this.
[13:07] The secret to life is the remedy is the recipe is meditation.
[13:12] So another pretty intense moment that I went through is I had a very, very Harsh breakup in 2015 and it really messed me up. And at the time, my roommate at the time, he gave me this book called the Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, a really well known book.
[13:31] And he's like, bro, you need to read this because you're like, you're going through it right now. And I just, at the time I was like, I took the book But I didn't read it.
[13:38] I just wasn't in a place to read the book. So then fast forward.
[13:42] When I moved to California and I stayed with my family friend, I was. I was in my room at her house, and she had this bookshelf. And, like, it's like this light was just shimmering off this one book.
[13:53] And I walked over. I was like. I was looking at all the books. I'm like, wow. I just started laughing. The power of now is just staring at me, and I'm like, okay.
[14:01] And, you know, like, a lot of the times if you're not able to resonate with something, like, it's not. You're just not going to pick it up. But I was in the energy and the frequency to resonate with the power of now at this time.
[14:11] So I read it, and it just kicked off my whole meditation journey. And so as I started meditating, I started just being able to let all those negative, heavy thoughts just, you know, just kind of dissipate.
[14:26] And that was. And then at that point, I was able to really just tap into my power and become relentless in my healing journey and getting to know who I really was and getting to love all my deep layers and loving myself and not really caring what other people thought about me.
[14:46] Because as I started this journey, especially moving to California from Connecticut, family and friends, bro. What, are you on drugs again? What are you crazy? Like, what are you doing all this meditation?
[14:56] Like, are you okay?
[14:58] It's like, where was all this when I wasn't doing this stuff, when I actually needed help? And now I'm taking care of myself and, you know, and then you're crazy, you know?
[15:07] So I always tell people, like, if you're doing things that are really, honestly making you feel good, that are healthy, it doesn't matter what anybody else thinks or says. You got to block it out.
[15:21] Because those things that people would say are usually the reasons in the first place that you got into the negative aspects or the negative thinking of yourself. You know, we start off as kids, and you have these, like, dreams that you have, because when you're a child, you have such a beautiful imagination.
[15:38] You want to grow to be a singer, a doctor, a lawyer, astronaut. What do people tell you? How would you want to sing? Your voice is terrible. Why would you want to be an astronaut?
[15:48] Space is scary, you know, all these things, and then that programming gets stuck with you. So I think it's really getting back to that childlike self and wonder and imagination inside of yourself.
[15:58] And for me, the number one Tool that has helped with my transformation has been meditation, which has led into the fasting and the affirmations and all those good things, which I'm sure we'll dive into in a little bit.
[16:09] Valerie Beck: I mean, everything snowballs, right? These habits, like, they compound, and then you discover more that gets you closer to yourself, and it's.
[16:17] It's a really exciting part of the journey. Actually.
[16:20] What I want to ask you about this is this notion of, well, so you touched upon limiting beliefs and also not feeling sorry about yourself. This can be really difficult for people because the ego wants to protect us.
[16:39] Right. And when we feel sorry for ourselves, it's really like a. The victim mindset.
[16:45] BMOOR: Yeah.
[16:45] Valerie Beck: And it lets us off the hook for things as opposed to empowering ourselves to make the choices to improve our lives. It's like we're putting that power elsewhere and trying to rely on it in a way.
[17:01] This is really difficult to do. So as you were learning to not feel sorry for yourself, what were the resistances that showed up for you and how did you overcome them?
[17:13] BMOOR: The resistance?
[17:14] Valerie Beck: Yeah.
[17:14] BMOOR: No, no, for sure. The one thing that came to me as you were, you know, explaining that was. Or in asking that was usually I feel like most people and for myself for.
[17:26] I'm just gonna speak for myself for this one, because I think it's going to resonate with a lot of people is when I decided or when I tried to stop feeling sorry for myself.
[17:35] Because it's a process. Right. This didn't happen overnight.
[17:39] It took me a little bit, was I realized that, like you said, the victimization. And what do victims love? They love reassurance that I am a victim, you know, from other people.
[17:52] So what it really was, I feel like when people play that role or when I was playing that role, was I wasn't able to get healthy love, so I needed to force it upon other people by living this destructive lifestyle.
[18:07] I didn't know how to get love healthy or anywhere else. I was living this destructive lifestyle that was calling for attention and seeking actually help. And so the resistance that I was facing was having to do all this work on my own, you know, sitting with myself, being by myself, and not seeking the comfort of external validation and seeking the comforts that came with the dopamine hits from the alcohol and the drugs.
[18:39] And so I would say the biggest resistance that I face were like my. My own thoughts just telling me, hey, like, you know, like, being in that confidence of, can I really do this?
[18:50] Can I really go from having a fearful, avoidant lifestyle to a secure lifestyle. Like, is that even a thing? Because, you know, I don't know if we're talking about attachment styles, fearful avoidance, basically.
[19:01] It's like you're always coming up with scenarios why it's not going to work out because of me, whether it's intimate relationship or friendship or family.
[19:09] And so I would say the biggest resistance was me was myself and understanding for me that I had to get to a point of just loving myself. One of my friends told me one time, she's, she's an energy worker and she says something to me and I was like, whoa.
[19:27] And she goes, listen, you, you have such a deep love for yourself.
[19:34] Nobody can love you like you love you.
[19:36] And just like when she said that, I was like, ****, I feel like I'm always looking for someone to love me the way that I love me and the way that I love other people.
[19:44] And I'm like, I'm a deep dude. Like, I really, I really love, like, I love my friends, I love people around me. I love, I just love because I know what it's like not to be loved and not to love myself.
[20:00] And so I was playing this victim role to receive love. But that love is not genuine when people are feeling sorry for you. Yeah, you know, it's like pity love, and that can only last so long, and that can only make you feel good for so long.
[20:18] And that's why you keep playing the victim role. Because it's like a drug. It's like that high goes away because that person goes away because it's like, yo, I, I love you, but I can't be around you because you're destructive.
[20:28] You're self destructive. So you're probably going to do some destructive stuff in my life. Okay, that person leaves, boom. I'm the victim. So I'm looking for the next victim to harness their energy from and harness their love.
[20:39] And then they're only going to be around for so long. So that's what I would say with the biggest resistance was, was waking up to my own bullshit and realizing that I had to stop being the victim and getting out of.
[20:53] And getting out of my own way and getting out of your own way.
[20:57] And it could be really hard, you know, because how do you get out of your own way when you don't even know what it looks like, when you don't even know that you're in your own way?
[21:05] And then facing the accountability for all the wrongs that I was. That was okay, that, boom, that, that was the hardest part of everything. Being, taking accountability for myself and facing the parts of myself that were really destructive and causing so much destruction to myself and to others.
[21:23] Like having to actually sit with that and face that. Those that. In the beginning of my meditation, those are the things that would stop my meditation practice. And, like, I wouldn't want to do the meditation because these heavy emotions and things are coming up from, you know, all the stuff that I was doing and the pain that I was causing people, causing myself.
[21:40] So having to face that, I would say was the hardest part of getting out of the victimization mind.
[21:45] Valerie Beck: Yeah, for sure.
[21:47] Later on, when I start to ask you about your philosophy, I want to know if you. If you work with people who are stuck in this and if you have any ideas on how to get them out.
[21:56] BMOOR: Yeah.
[21:57] Valerie Beck: Because I think we come across people like that all the time, and it is hard every day.
[22:02] BMOOR: Every day, all day.
[22:05] Valerie Beck: Okay. So I think I want to go on to your. Your idea of how you got help.
[22:11] A lot of this work that you're talking about relies on you being able to show up for yourself and doing stuff by yourself.
[22:18] Taking time to, like, sit in silence. And because a lot of these habits, too, they're very isolating. They're not conventional.
[22:25] A lot of people don't want to do them because they're not necessarily, quote, unquote, fun.
[22:29] So how did you keep yourself motivated? Did you find. Did you get a coach? How were you able to stay on track?
[22:36] BMOOR: I was able to stay on track with everything that I was doing because, like we had talked about in the beginning, the levels of self awareness and synchronicities. And I try to stay away from saying manifestations.
[22:51] The things that I was allowing to create in my reality were just so powerful and so profound that the more that I did the work, the more these experiences would be happening.
[23:04] Until the fact that I got to the point where I was like, wow, this. There is no powerhouse out of me that's greater than me. It's really me. And. And another side of that is the quote, when the student is ready, the teacher will appear.
[23:19] Oh, man, such a trip to. I just thinking about things. And then. So when I got out here, I. I was found. I was found by a mentor. And so this mentor taught me how to conduct one of the businesses that I'm in.
[23:35] But it was way more than that. It was a whole life shift. And so I would take a lot of the teachings that he was instilling with me. I actually became vegan from his influence.
[23:47] And so I got out Here I went to Brazil with him a month and a half after I got here without really even barely knowing him, a weekend of knowing him.
[23:57] He invited me to Brazil on this business slash fun trip because this carnival is happening at the same time. I was like, dude, I don't know you, but yeah, but yeah, I want to go to Brazil.
[24:07] So we go to Brazil. I'm in the. I'm still fresh start of this transformation. So I saw this big chip on my shoulder, this ego. So it was just a lot of, a lot of it was a roller coaster of emotion happening on the trip.
[24:19] And lo and behold, we all, we almost fought multiple times. And one of the times was he had said something to me that absolutely ticked me off. But it was the most powerful thing that, one of the most powerful things and life changing things that he ever said to me.
[24:37] And it was shut the F up and just listen.
[24:41] And then when he said it, my ego just got so triggered and I'm like, yo. In my head I'm like, who is this dude talking to like that? But then he was like, yo, if you just.
[24:51] Because another thing was too. Before I was like in my power, you know, I would do the nervous laughing or I would do the nervous talking if it was quiet.
[25:00] Because, you know, that's just. I was not like, if it was quiet, I was uncomfortable. Like something had to be said, you know. And so he was like, when you just shut up and listen, you can hear what other people have to tell you in terms of can you help them?
[25:17] Do you want to help them? Can you love them? Do you want to love them? Because people love to express themselves and most people aren't used to being heard too actively.
[25:25] So if I become an active listener and listen to people, people are going to tell me things about themselves that they barely ever tell anybody. And with that power, I can choose to either make a difference in their life, try to, or just, you know, let them be where they're at.
[25:40] And so that was probably one of the most powerful pieces of advice that I've taken from him.
[25:47] As I started practicing the act of listening, the meditation, the fasting, and gaining more self awareness and self power and having my thoughts and ideas that I saw for myself, creating in the reality.
[25:58] Because I was doing the work and I was stripping off all the programming, that power allowed me to stay in motion in the practices, in the power. And that's all that has what has allowed me to keep staying really active on this journey.
[26:14] I think once you start doing the work and the Synchronicities start. Start hitting. You think of someone, they text or call you. You think like, hey, I need some money for this bill.
[26:25] Boom. The next day someone pays you a zelle or, you know, you get a new client or whatever it is, it's because you're. You're putting the work in. And so once you realize that, it's really hard.
[26:37] For me, it's been really hard to stop.
[26:41] Valerie Beck: Nice.
[26:41] BMOOR: Really hard to stop. Yeah.
[26:43] Valerie Beck: So this actually leads really well into the next topic I want to talk about. And it has to do with this notion of abundance mindset. And you were getting a little bit into it already when you put it out in the universe that you.
[26:53] You need some or you desire something rather.
[26:56] And this is a shift that I made for myself probably this year or last year after reading a book called 10x is easier than 2x.
[27:06] And it was the distinction between want and desire and need and scarcity mindset. So the distinction that was being made was that need is actually a mindset of scarcity, and that want is more.
[27:22] And desire is more of a mindset of abundance because you already have what you need.
[27:27] Like, how does abundance mindset and that play into how you've been able to change your life?
[27:36] BMOOR: Man, even that still to this day is one of those things that is a lot of work.
[27:42] Valerie Beck: Yeah.
[27:42] BMOOR: You know, like, shoot, do I deserve these things? And I think maybe the last year and few months, I've really stepped into the, you know, like, why, why not? Why don't I deserve to have the condo or house that I want?
[27:56] You know, the amount of money that I want to work with the people that I want? And so there's a practice, actually, and I've been sharing it a lot these past two, three months because I've been practicing it so consistently, and it's been completely shifting, just blockages and rewiring reprogram at my subconscious mind.
[28:18] And so the practice that I want to share, so any listeners that you know, I would love to try it out, is.
[28:25] So say there's a relationship with somebody or. Okay, the. The best example is like the two examples I'll use as a financial one, like, say I get a ticket on my car.
[28:37] When I see that ticket or value, like, if you saw a ticket on your car, what's the first? You'd be like, you know, like, you'd get upset. You'd probably like, tense up for a second, like, ****, like, I'm so, so mad, blah, blah, blah.
[28:49] Or say you're dealing with somebody that triggers you or upset to you. And so, like, every time you see the person, you get that, like, kind of like tense feeling in your body.
[28:58] And that same like, ****, this person upsets me. Yada, yada, yada.
[29:01] So when I'm in these moments, the first thing that I do and I actually, like, I had to do this. I do it every day, actually, because there's always things that are coming up.
[29:10] You know, we're humans. And so immediately when these situations happen, I'll ask myself right away, what does this situation look like? If it was an ideal situation for me, if it was in my best interest, and immediately my body will relax and I'll start smiling because.
[29:31] All right, save for the ticket. What's the best situation?
[29:35] I got the money to pay the ticket or dismiss it somehow. All right, so what happens? The next day I get a new client. The next day, I get a check in the mail.
[29:45] Right. The person that's bothering me or has been bothering me and triggering me. What does it look like in the most ideal situation with that person?
[29:53] I just see my. I see it in my head. Me and the person are smiling and laughing and talking about something. I feel so relaxed and happy. And so now what happens in my reality?
[30:03] The next week, I see that person. We're having a joyful conversation. Like, all the stress and whatever's gone. Why? Because I'm creating that situation in my mind.
[30:15] And so it's really. We always hear about these visualization practices which are really, really, like, important and powerful, but your mind doesn't know the difference. Your subconscious mind doesn't know the difference between you having something and not having something.
[30:29] So seeing the thing, but then feeling the energy behind it, that's.
[30:35] That's the power. Because what is emotions is energy, emotion. So if I can have a say in how I emotionally feel and respond to things, and they're in my ideal situation, my mind's going to create those situations back to me in my reality.
[30:53] And so that is a hack that I've been able to use to create ideal situations and abundance and flow and situations that work out for me in my best interest.
[31:04] And then the more that you practice that, it's just second nature. You almost don't even have to ask yourself the question anymore. When those things happen, you. You immediately just go right into the practice.
[31:14] And then it's like, well, if I'm always in that practice, what's not going to work out for me? Yeah, you know? Yeah, so. So that's. That's kind of just how I'VE been able to move through the thoughts of lack.
[31:33] I don't. They're like, when you get to the soul. All these practices I've been talking about, the meditation, the practice I just talked about, I'm sure we're gonna talk about fasting and then affirmations like, I don't pray to and ask anymore.
[31:46] Because if you're asking for something, that means that you don't have it. So, like, when I sit down and, you know, I pray, my prayer is like, thank you for the strength that I have.
[31:54] Like, it's just kind of reconfirming all the things inside of me. And then. So as I've been able to strip all the programming from my mind and my psyche, the more understanding I have of myself and my power.
[32:05] And so it's like, there's nothing that I really cannot obtain if I really put my mind to it. You know, they say in the beginning there was the word, but that's not actually the beginning, because to be able to come up with a word, you have to have a thought first.
[32:18] So everything starts in the mind. Everything starts with your thoughts. So if you can get to a place where you're having the thoughts that serve you constantly over and over and over and over and over and again, and it embeds into your subconscious mind, man, you're going to obtain everything that you desire.
[32:35] Valerie Beck: Yeah.
[32:37] BMOOR: Wait, do it again. Do it again. Yeah.
[32:42] Valerie Beck: I love that. And it really does. It's parallel to my journey, too. I have gone through phases of. Especially doing the visualization, I think, is really powerful, a practice that comes in and out.
[32:54] And I feel like it just needs. For me, I need to. Or I want to rather instill it back into my routine because it gets me to this place where I am very, very much intentionally creating my future.
[33:07] And whether or not that happens or not is not really the point. Like, yes, yes, I do want these things, but it's like, to be the person who will have these things, right?
[33:18] To be the person that is already there.
[33:22] And so my coach calls it stepping into future you.
[33:26] And it is very subtle because it's like, it's the difference between embodying who you truly are and kind of looking at the gap between where you are and where you'd want to be.
[33:39] Does that make sense?
[33:40] BMOOR: Yeah, a hundred percent. A hundred percent. If. If I can kind of build off of that a little bit.
[33:45] Valerie Beck: Yeah.
[33:46] BMOOR: Your. Your emotions and your feelings are usually the hindrances behind that full embody of. Of you. Right. So it's What I understand is that we already have a makeup, a destiny.
[34:02] A destiny, a trajectory that we are on, that we're here to walk the path.
[34:10] The thing is, we go through these experiences right in the Bible, it's like it says just as like a parable that, you know, we're, we're laid across the world as these seeds.
[34:22] And based on where you're planted, you grow up. So that environment that you grow up in shapes, shapes your understanding in the world and the emotions and feelings that you're, you're going to basically have until you decide to see that and do the work.
[34:40] So if I, for me, like when I was younger, I had big emotions, so I was very emotionally manipulated. I was very easily emotionally manipulated. I was very over emotional in a negative aspect.
[34:52] Right. So that would, if, if my life trajectory for, you know, my design is here, my emotions and heavy feelings are pulling me this way because they're taking me off course.
[35:05] So if I can learn to do the work, to know my power in my emotions and my feelings and use them in a positive aspect to work for me, and instead of veering all the way over here in the, in the trajectory that's way off from the path that serves me the most, I can start to do the work and bring me back to the trajectory that's going to, you know, fulfill me the most.
[35:27] So I think a lot of the stuff that, you know, you're talking about with your coach has to do with how do you show up for yourself to make sure that every day you're as balanced as you can be.
[35:40] And so like with the meditation practices, right. I'm sure you experience this like, not every day. I want to wake up and meditate. I don't meditate every day at this point.
[35:47] Maybe I meditate like three or four times out of the week, sometimes one to two times a week. Just because that's how it goes. Yeah, but the more I get into the practice and I get back into it, the more powerful my days are, the more powerful my weeks are.
[35:59] So even the practice that, you know, you said that you want to do more of the like, subconscious rewiring, the more that you practice it and start to see how it affects your life positively, it's really hard to stay away from it.
[36:11] And it's one of those things like, you know, it's like you just got to, you just got to, got to do it. You just got to do it, you know, so that's how I've seen this thing.
[36:20] And we're all Here, destined for, I don't want to say greatness, but you could be that. You chose that.
[36:29] Valerie Beck: Your version of it, right?
[36:31] BMOOR: Your version of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[36:37] Valerie Beck: Have you ever felt like you're standing at the edge of a new chapter in your life, ready to take that leap, but something always keeps holding you back? If that resonates, let me invite you to take that leap with us at Club Phoenix.
[36:51] Club Phoenix is more than a program. It's a year long journey of transformation designed to help you reclaim your energy, align your mindset, and build the habits you need to step into your full potential.
[37:03] It's time to rise from the ashes and embrace the best version of yourself. Spots are limited, so visit www.intrepidwellness.life today to learn more and apply your evolution starts now.
[37:21] Let's. Let's talk about the fasting. Because, you know, I study Ayurveda and for a while I was very resistant to the notion of it.
[37:30] BMOOR: Mm.
[37:31] Valerie Beck: Because some people take it a little too far and that kind of creates the notion or the idea that like real, it's dangerous or whatnot. So I've been reading my coach's book Uninflamed and, and she's a huge proponent of it.
[37:45] And. But she talks about the notion of creating space in the body and how you can also create the space in your mind and it happens concurrently. Right. But what happens when you create space?
[37:59] One is that you get start to get really uncomfortable if you, if you are not comfortable with space. Right.
[38:05] And you talked about how you used to fill the air with conversation or like comments or something like that to like avoid that discomfort.
[38:12] BMOOR: Mm.
[38:13] Valerie Beck: But when you fast, you are directly coming against this. You are intentionally doing it to create space for other possibilities to happen.
[38:22] BMOOR: Yeah.
[38:23] Valerie Beck: And so when I heard of that approach to fasting and not only that, but the actual physical benefits of it. Right. The autophagy and like cleaning house and your body, getting rid of toxins and all of that.
[38:32] I was like, yes, this makes a lot of sense. So I want to hear about your how you started fasting, like why you are a proponent of it and what it does for you.
[38:41] BMOOR: First off, I love the word autophagy. It's like one of my favorite words. Well, you're fasting right now, right?
[38:49] Valerie Beck: In a sense.
[38:51] BMOOR: How does it make you feel?
[38:52] Valerie Beck: So I'm doing more of the intermittent fasting and I'm also doing a little bit, you know, just like a little bit of calorie restriction I've done previously too. I've done like a fast mimicking diet, which is basically five days of a very restricted calorie intake, which tricks your body into the.
[39:09] The process of fasting.
[39:11] So I really love the. That it creates a clearing for me to slow down and focus on myself. It creates quiet and it allows me to make better decisions for myself.
[39:26] Smarter decisions.
[39:27] BMOOR: Yeah.
[39:28] Valerie Beck: Because I'm also clearing out my schedule while I'm fasting. I'm clearing out my commitments when I'm fasting. And then it, it opens up the space to create new ones. Right. So a really good example of this is this month I decided to take on your personal training.
[39:42] BMOOR: Yeah.
[39:43] Valerie Beck: I could have done so many other things that I've already been doing, but if I were to slow down and really think, like, what do I need right now?
[39:51] Then I do need this push and everything will align. This is a really big personal development month for me and I decided to make it that way to make sure that like, I am going towards the trajectory that I'm meant to be on rather than the one that kind of like my ego wants me to be on.
[40:07] Yeah.
[40:07] BMOOR: Yeah, for sure.
[40:08] Valerie Beck: Yeah.
[40:08] BMOOR: Thank you for that. Share that reflection. Beautiful.
[40:11] It. It reminds me of I did a six month alkaline cleanse last year. And in the beginning of it, like you were talking about, the alkaline cleanse was cleaning the inside of my body.
[40:23] And so as I was cleaning the inside of my body, I just wanted to clean my house. I was like cleaning the crooks and corners. I was cleaning out my space, like everything.
[40:31] Right. Because everything that happens internally, everything that happens externally, it starts first. Internally.
[40:38] Valerie Beck: Yeah.
[40:38] BMOOR: Right. Um, so it was a very powerful reflection.
[40:43] So how I started fasting, it actually started with intermittent fasting. So I remember when I was younger, my sister would do like she did Ramadan one time. And I just remember hear hearing her like talk about it and I was like, what's the point of not eating?
[40:56] And that was always in my head. I'm like, why is she doing Ramadan? Like, what is that? Right? So long story short, my mentor that I was talking about, I went to go eat one time with him and his friends, and his friend was telling me he does intermittent fasting, so he'll do 21 days out of every month of intermittent fasting.
[41:13] And so basically he would choose like a eight hour window to eat.
[41:17] Valerie Beck: Yeah.
[41:17] BMOOR: And I remember I'm sitting there, he's telling me this and I'm like eating my food. And this is again at the beginning of my healing journey, like my transformation And I was just tearing this plate up and I was like, yeah, I'm stuffing my face.
[41:29] I'm like, yeah, I could probably do that. And they're sitting there laughing at me like, they're like, dude, the way you're eating that plate, there ain't no way you can.
[41:34] Intermittent fast.
[41:36] So I took it personal.
[41:39] I was like, what? So I did the 21 days of intermittent fasting. So I picked like an eight hour window. I don't know if I started it. I think actually I'm like, I said I'm pretty intense.
[41:49] I actually, I think I started off with a six hour window.
[41:51] Valerie Beck: Okay.
[41:52] BMOOR: So I did like one to seven. And I remember in the beginning of it, like by the time like 11:00 noon hit, I was like getting hangry. I was like, yo, is this even worth it?
[42:05] Like I could like, why? Why am I doing this?
[42:08] And at the same time I started the meditation practices and I realized I was like, this is part of all the self limiting, like deep internal conflict conversations.
[42:20] Why am I having such resistance to this? And so as I started diving deep into that and really for me, all the mental stuff was the stuff that fuels me.
[42:31] Like the discipline of everything. Like, I know how to work out. I've always, like, I've lost, I've been £270 two separate times. So it's like, I know I can lose the weight.
[42:39] The way that my mind was reshaping, that was the power for me with the fasting. So then I did the 21 days of intermittent fasting. I remember, like my body looked really good.
[42:50] I felt really good. I had, I had so much energy. And then I started doing water fast. So I started like a day of. No, of no eating, just drinking water.
[42:58] Two days, three days. I would start doing seven day water fast. And then of. And then In July of 2020, during the pandemic, I had, I had time. So I did a 21 day water fast.
[43:13] And that completely changed my life. And so for me, there's three. I'm not religious, but I do study all the scriptures and the ancient texts and there's three reoccurring themes that reoccur in all scriptures, all spiritual texts.
[43:29] And these three themes, these three modalities that they explain in the text that will help you connect more with yourself and others and, you know, the universe. And that's fasting, meditation and prayer or affirmations.
[43:43] And so as I started practicing all three of those consistently, I've gained that self connection that we've been talking about. But fasting has been amazing. I, I think it's the number one healing method.
[43:55] If you look at people who are sick with like cancer and all types of, you know, autoimmune diseases and things like that, mixed with a very clean diet, a whole food diet, mainly plant based, if you're, you know, trying to cure yourself of a disease mixed with fasting has been numerously, so many times proven to help cure and prevent and get rid of these diseases that are happening.
[44:19] Because what happens is you're allowing your cells basically to regenerate and do their magic instead of having to try to break down the food and, and all these things. And so then on this fasting journey, I've been able to inspire other people to do it.
[44:34] And multiple times when people are like, are fasting, I'll get FaceTime calls and everyone's crying and they're like, I don't know why I'm crying right now. And I'm so emotional.
[44:43] And the same thing happened to me my first three day water fast. I was just crying. I was just crying because so many times we go to seek food for comfort and a lot of times we don't realize we're emotional eating.
[44:55] So it's like these emotions are trying to come up and like get our attention, but we're going out to get food. Right. Remember the trajectory we were talking about?
[45:02] Valerie Beck: Right.
[45:03] BMOOR: If I'm on that trajectory, I'm on that highway. But I always have to get off of the exit because it is right there. Chick fil a is at this exit and I'm always just boom, boom, distracted.
[45:12] Every exit I can't really maintain and stay focused on that highway, the trajectory for my best self. And so fasting has just, it's just really helped me connect with myself and other people.
[45:25] And then last thing, the last fast that I did, me and my friend hold a group, group fast. And this one was tough for a lot of people. Like everybody was kind of.
[45:34] It's funny, we'll have different themes on different group fasts. Like some of them will be dope, some of them, everyone's kind of going through the same thing. It's like really interesting to see.
[45:41] Yeah, to me that all aligns with, you know, the astrology. Anyway, this one was tough because I think of all the things that are going on in the world, you know, what's going on over in the Middle East.
[45:52] And I remember I was sitting in bed and I just started crying. I'm like, I'm over here like having a rough Fast and. But I understand that there's people that haven't eaten in months.
[46:05] And so being able to have a little bit, a tiny speck. Speck of being able to connect with somebody else that's going through some atrocious things on some kind of level, to be able to, you know, have an understanding a little bit, not even close to what's going on over there, just allowed me to really, just feel really deeply and, you know, have some of those emotions come up, you know, so it gets deep.
[46:40] Yeah.
[46:40] Valerie Beck: That's amazing.
[46:41] BMOOR: It's deep.
[46:42] Valerie Beck: Totally. Yeah. I love it. Thank you for sharing.
[46:47] BMOOR: Yeah. Another benefit, last one is you look amazing. Like when you're fasting, like, your skin's glowing. I mean, you came into the gym the other day, I was like, oh, look at you.
[46:56] Like, skin's popping, glowing. Um, so anyone that's looking for the aesthetics or like the physical, you know, fasting is great for your body, so good for your body.
[47:06] Valerie Beck: All right, so here is a question. I think, because I, A lot of people, this is another thing that I come across is a lot of people are triggered by the notion of fasting and weight loss.
[47:17] So. Yeah, what, what is your take on that? Right. Because a lot of people, it does threaten their ideology.
[47:26] Yeah. Or their belief. Right. Like the, the, the belief like you're perfect and this goes, actually, this goes back to future you and all that and the, the perfect, whole and complete as a notion, but then also like they're, you know, working towards your goals and your visions for yourself.
[47:43] But yeah, there I think some people get confused of like, being whole, perfect and complete means, like, you should stay the same and like, embrace who you are and even when things are not quite lining up for you health wise or whatnot.
[47:59] So, yeah. Have you come across that and like, how do you address that?
[48:01] BMOOR: Oh, yeah. I mean, I'm in the, I'm in the, I'm in the fitness world. You know, that's my, my, my day to day job. So, you know, I'm surrounded by a lot of, say like bodybuilders, but, you know, people that feel like they're experts on things.
[48:16] So with a lot of things that I do, I think I go against conventional wisdom and I'm okay with that because again, these are like very ancient practices. And so it's funny, you know, a lot of people are, you know, religious or Christian.
[48:31] So I mean, what does the Bible say? Jesus fasted for 40 days and 40 nights.
[48:36] So I'm like, you think you're gonna die for not eating for three days, you know. And so the number one thing that I do in any of these experiences or situations is just share my experience.
[48:50] Because I can sit here and argue with somebody, but that's just gonna, you know, give into their energy and it's gonna drain me. And I don't have time to argue with people anymore.
[49:00] So I just shared, I just share my experiences. I share other people's experiences. I talk about the science of it. Because, you know, a lot of people, if they're not going to be able to understand my words, then I hit them with the science.
[49:15] Talking about the autophagy, talking about what fasting for more than 18 hours does for your body and what that looks like, right? Cell regeneration, blood cleansing, like your own body, filtering it, filtering your own blood.
[49:28] You know, that's the job of your liver, it's a job of a lot of your organs. And so I can only share. And that's another thing, right? All these things that we're talking about is being able to embody it.
[49:40] Because I'm sure there's been times in your life where people have, people have tried to share something or tell you to do something, but you can feel on an energetic level, they don't practice these things.
[49:49] So why would I listen to you? So me being able to practice and show, you know, I don't know how familiar everybody was in numerology, but I'm a, I'm a 22, I'm a master builder.
[50:01] So being a master builder, it's like people are going to move off of the things that I build and they can see. So if I'm constantly talking about things but not doing it, the energy is not going to be there.
[50:13] So all I do is just share experiences, share the benefits, share some of the struggles and trouble and troubles that I face with these things. But as far as trying to change people's mind about fasting and what that looks like and plant based eating and all the other things that I do, I don't have to argue with people.
[50:31] So one of the things that I've realized is that I don't pay attention to people who are in my audience, right? If you want to hear what I have to say and it resonates and it gravitates towards you.
[50:41] Hop on board. We gonna, we gonna, we're gonna ride the boat like Noah and all the animals, right? We're gonna get everybody on the boat. We're gonna do the thing.
[50:48] If not, that's cool, you know, when you're ready, come Around. If not, you know, we'll let you rock.
[50:55] Because I feel like most people are looking for argument, you know, most people are trying to get a rise out of you for what?
[51:00] Valerie Beck: Absolutely. Very well said. All right, So I think I feel pretty good about this. I love so much of what you shared. We definitely are on the same wavelength in terms of our philosophy, and so that's been really exciting to share ideas with you.
[51:15] I did ask you before we started if you would share the breathing exercise that you did before we started, because it's very simple.
[51:25] And I think for people out there who are not just not familiar with breathing practices, I think this is a really good one to start off with. So if you don't mind.
[51:35] Love to.
[51:37] And explain a little bit about, you know, what is the. What is the idea behind it? What. What are the benefits behind doing intentional breathing and all that?
[51:45] BMOOR: Yeah. So the number one thing that you have is your pranayama is your breath. If you don't have your breath, you're going to die.
[51:52] And I don't. I don't know if people have seen anybody, but I've seen people that, like, they have anxiety attacks and what they do, they go grab the bag and they breathe in the bag because you're allowing all the oxygen to relax your muscles, relax your nervous system, that somatic healing.
[52:06] Right. So my big thing again is I could talk about it all day, but just showing people.
[52:12] So I think the big thing that as we get into this is actually, let's get into it. And then as you're sitting here right now listening to my voice with your eyes closed, possibly, I think would be the best.
[52:26] I want you to take notice of how you feel right now and just kind of do a body scan. For the listeners out there. If you're in your car, in your room, you know, wherever you are, just.
[52:39] Just do a body scan. Do you feel any tension anywhere in your body? You can kind of start down at your feet and then work your way up to your shins to your knees.
[52:49] You feel any tension in your quads.
[52:53] So we're just doing a quick body scan. From your quads up to your hips, any tension in there.
[53:00] And then from your hips to your abdominal, abdominal, your lower back up to your chest, your upper back to your shoulders, down to your elbows, to your forearms, to your hands, your fingers, and then back up your arms to your shoulder, your neck area up to your head, feeling any tension.
[53:24] And if you almost can take a snapshot of how you feel right now in this moment, where you're at, what does your body feel like? What does your mind feel like?
[53:42] And so what we're going to do for this breathing exercise, we're just going to take three deep inhales. I'm going to guide them.
[53:50] And so we'll start with our first one. We're going to take a deep inhale through the nose, breathing in as much air as you can, filling up your stomach in your lungs, allowing your stomach to be filled with so much air, you almost have a Santa Claus, Buddha belly.
[54:03] So go ahead, breathe in a little bit more at the top, and then a nice heavy exhale, audible if you can, just allowing the tension to go, allowing yourself to really connect with your body and be present.
[54:19] And now we're going to go ahead and take a second deep inhale to the nose, drawing in the air at the top, filling up that belly in that chest, drawing a little bit more at the top.
[54:30] Inhale, inhale, exhale.
[54:33] A nice audible sigh, letting it go, just connecting with the space and where you are right now.
[54:42] And then on our last one, this is going to be the deepest inhale of all three, of all three of them. So we're going to go ahead and inhale through the nose, breathing in air, as much air as you can, and then breathing in a little bit more at the top and exhale, letting any anxiety, tension, stress, anything no longer serves you, just allow it to wash away.
[55:07] And now I want you to think back to that snapshot that you take took before we started the practice.
[55:14] And how do you feel now that you did a breathing exercise?
[55:19] Maybe you feel more relaxed, more calm, more present. Some of that tension melted away, and that's how powerful connecting with your breath and being intentional with your breathing, you know, can be for your body and your mind, just allowing you to be present with yourself and aware.
[55:40] So that's the breathing exercise and breathing practice.
[55:44] And you can do this any time of the day, anywhere you're at, whenever you need to, just to kind of just come back.
[55:51] Valerie Beck: Fantastic. Thank you.
[55:53] BMOOR: Yeah.
[55:54] Valerie Beck: Yeah.
[55:55] All right. I hope you all have a wonderful day after this.
[55:59] So, to close off, thank you so much for bringing your energy here today for sharing your knowledge, for sharing your experience, for your vulnerability.
[56:08] How can people find you?
[56:10] BMOOR: Yeah, of course people can find me on Instagram at Be more alive. B M o o r alive. My website is bemorelife.com b m o o r l I f e dot com and those are the best ways to find me.
[56:27] But, yeah, I feel like Instagram is definitely the best way for sure.
[56:31] Valerie Beck: Okay. All right. Thank you so much, and I'll catch you later.
[56:36] BMOOR: Yeah. Thank you so much for having me on your. On your platform and allowing me to share my story. I really appreciate it. And my last message to anyone listening is just know that there is no power outside of you that is more powerful than you are.
[56:52] Do the work. Show up for yourself. You know, just keep going. Times get hard, but it's just testing your strength and your willpower. And so much beauty is on the other side of struggle. Like, so much beauty. All right, thank you.
[57:06] Valerie Beck: Thank you, everyone, for tuning in. We'll catch you next time.
[57:08] BMOOR: Peace.
